Thursday, February 24, 2011


It’s funny that I’m the one my loved ones come to when they want something ‘done right.’  They always compliment me on my creativity, organizational skills, determination, vast knowledge and generally pleasant disposition (well, that last one is up for debate…  HOWEVER, when it comes time for me to do something….anything….for myself, I half-step.  If you come to my house, you can see that I have a good eye for decorating.  I have a few nice pieces in every room in the house but very little effort has been put forth to complete the ensemble .  The vehicle that I drive is decent, but there’s always ‘stuff’ in it so that one has rarely seen it at its prettiest.  Not to mention, I bought it with a clearly flawed interior, knowing I should’ve & could’ve gotten a much better deal for my money (but that’s another story).  I get a lot of compliments on my fashion sense, yet I only ‘put on’ for ‘special occasions.’  I have nice things in my closet, but in general, I think my wardrobe kinda sucks.  It’s not because I can’t afford a better one, it’s because I don’t make it a priority to go out and get things I really want.  What does all this have to do with losing weight, you may be wondering?  Well, I’m approaching this weight-loss journey the same way I’ve approached most every other journey in my life that was for my own benefit……HALF-ASSED.
Altho, this week, I’ve done okay food-wise, I haven’t been to the gym since Friday.  Sure, I can convince myself that I have good reason (I was stressed, depressed, sleep-deprived) but the bottom line is, there is no excuse.  I didn’t go because I didn’t think it was that important (obviously).  I still have to remind/reassure myself that I am worth the effort.  I’m still questioning whether or not this time is gonna be the last time (aka permanently successful)?  I am still talking myself out of the good things in life.  I Am Still Listening To The Negative (excuse-making) Voice In My Head!   THIS. HAS. GOT. TO. STOP.  In order to cut this ass in half, I have to stop half-assing my efforts….PRAY FOR ME!