Wednesday, August 8, 2012


If you've been Keeping Up With BFly (which is not hard to do, since my posts have been few and far between), you know that I've been battling the bulge and telling all my business  documenting my progress, or lack thereof.  Since my last progress report, I've had to deal with some heartbreaking and life-shattering events, including the death of my beloved baby brother. After my brother's death, I stopped going to the gym and I ceased following the Weight Watchers program. I just didn't have the energy nor the desire to participate in much. However, I did keep in mind that I am on a journey to change my lifestyle and in life, tragedies happen, changes occur and courses abruptly change without warning. So, I constantly reminded myself, I must be able to navigate those things and not be thrown too far off my path. So, while there were definitely times I turned to food for comfort, I had some good days and some not-that-bad days. Despite me not following a rigid exercise/eating regimen, I'm glad to report that I have not gained weight as a result. In fact, in my last report, I was looking forward to getting out of the 220s and, guess what?  I DID IT!  I am now 219 lbs.

I recently started working out again and actually enjoyed the kickboxing class I took last night. It was tough, being one of the few big girls in the room, but it only made me want to work harder and keep going. I was sweating, feeling the burn and even had to skip while they jumped take it down a notch a few times but it only let me know that I wasn't just going through the motions, but actually putting in work. My body and mind are getting stronger; that, coupled with the recognition I get about my changing look (I get at least one compliment a day), inspires me to continue working hard and making the changes I need for a healthier, slimmer body.

Now all I need is a savings account set up for me to shop from when I reach my goal size/ I have any sponsors???


There’s been a lot of talk about our golden girl, Olympic gold medal-winning gymnast, Gabby Douglas, who, at just 16 years old, not only led the U.S. women to Olympic gold in gymnastics but she has also landed magazine and cereal box covers. So why are people – black people, mainly – talking about Gabby’s unkempt hair instead of her achievements? Some would argue that ‘that’s our problem now’, we are always focused on the ‘wrong’ things. We would rather talk about hair and other superficial matters than important stuff like, a young black girl accomplishing her dream of becoming an Olympian instead of somebody’s baby momma or the fact that dedication and hard work paid off in Olympian gold for Gabby not celebrity-inspired gold bought by a drug-dealing boyfriend or the fact that Gabby is more concerned with keeping her body fit and healthy in order to perfect her gymnastic moves and not ‘drop, stop and poppin’ moves. While I agree that sometimes, we (black people) do get caught up in appearances, material things and glitz & glamour, we're not the only ones (hey, fellow Americans!) and I think there’s another perspective to this hairstory.
First of all, we are taught, from an early age, that one must put forth their best appearance as first impressions are critical and appearance does matter. A person who is neatly dressed and coiffed will have the edge over someone who isn’t. A person who is fashionably dressed is received better than, say, a plain jane. Not that any of that has a darn thing to do with the skill it takes to become an Olympian, but I’m just saying (our obsession with appearance didn't just come out of nowhere). Secondly, I am a woman and mother of a daughter. Throughout my life, if ever I had some place to go (or not), my mother kept my hair done. If there was a special occasion or an extra-special destination I was going to (say, London for the Olympics as an Olympian), my hair would be extra-tight. Not extra tight in a painful way but extra tight in a way that every hair would be perfectly in place and shining like the sun. I was taught that you should always try to put your best face forward and when out in public, you are representing not only yourself but your family, too. So, when people started saying, ‘Why wasn’t Gabby’s hair done?!’ I thought it came more from a familial, loving and protective place than a place of misplaced focus, unordered priorities or hateration.

I’m not gonna lie. When I saw her on the Olympic floor, I said, ‘Now why is her hair like that?!’ This was while beaming with pride from seeing a black teenaged girl doing her thing on the Olympic floor, instead of somebody’s club floor. I know nothing about the Olympics, their schedule, if/who was responsible for getting Gabby’s hair done – maybe she missed her appointment, maybe the stylist didn’t show up – but what I do know is that, in her most glorious moment, she should’ve been coiffed to perfection – just like all the other girls were. Well, I guess I shouldn’t say ‘all’ because I haven’t actually seen them all but all the ones I did see had their damn hair done. I’m not suggesting she should’ve had a long, wavy weave, 40 inch ponytail or bone straight tresses blowing in the wind. But I do know that the ‘do she was sporting could’ve been done much better than it was. A little bit of gel and a few – okay, maybe more than a few – jewel-adorned bobby pins could’ve turned that ‘who didn’t do it’ into a pretty, perfectly pinned pony. Hopefully, instead of taking the complaints as just a bunch of grumbling black folk, Gabby and her parents/team will take something positive from the backlash and put more effort into the golden girl’s future appearances. In the meantime, we are proud of you, you done great and we look forward to you doing, being and looking even greater. Keep going for the gold GABBY! We do love you!