Since my last post, I made a decision to begin the process for weight-loss surgery ('WLS'). I've tried all kinds of diets and I've tried to manage this myself. Nothing has worked. So I put down my pride and picked up some information regarding 'WLS.' There are many options available.....gastric bypass, gastric sleeve, gastric banding and more. The decision is mostly up to the patient but there are recommended procedures for people of a certain weight and/or health condition. Although I've yet to get my recommendation from the doctor, I've decided I want the Lap-Band surgery. For those of you who are unfamiliar with it, the short of it is: a surgical band is placed around the opening of the stomach to make the opening and the stomach itself much smaller than normal size. This restricts the amount of food that can pass through and be held in the stomach. After surgery, the stomach is said to hold (approximately) the equivalent of 2 oz. of food. TWO OUNCES Y'ALL! However, the band can be adjusted to make the opening bigger or smaller, according to weight-loss goals and health needs. Click on this link to learn more - http://www.lapband.com/en/learn_about_lapband/device_how_it_works/
Before one can be scheduled for surgery, there are a series of medical and psychological evaluations to undertake. You cannot have the surgery if it will likely endanger your life or you aren't mentally ready. No doctor is going to do the surgery 'just so your boyfriend won't leave you' or 'to help you snag a woman.' The pre-surgery process usually takes anywhere between 3 - 6 mos but can take much longer, depending on your specific medical history and how well you follow instructions. Since my official start on August 9, I've taken 4 of my 17 required steps. I would like to be able to schedule surgery for late January but, at the rate I'm going (verrrryyyy slowwww), I don't know if it's gonna happen then......if it happens at all. 'What do you mean, if it happens at all?!' you're probably wondering.
Well, during the orientation phase, we learned about the different WLS options available, amongst other things like healthy eating and exercising. We were also told (more than a few times) that the goal isn't to get surgery. Instead, the goal is to teach one how to take control of their health; recognize what went wrong and make choices to make things right.....without surgery. However, it is also acknowledged that, if it was just that simple, there would be no need for the orientation or the surgery. That being said, I'm hoping fooling myself into thinking that I can finally get a hold of things and do this on my own so I won't need the surgery. HA! Who knows? Maybe I will, maybe I won't.
In the meantime, in sticking with the plan (within the next 6 weeks), I need to schedule appointments for my Sleep Apnea evaluation review, with the Nutritionist & Dietician and my primary care doctor. Hell, I'm gonna lose 25 lbs just from the change I'll have to dish out in co-pays.........Oh My!
By now, we all know there is no 'magic pill' nor quick permanent solution to losing weight. You must expend more calories than you take in.....period. You must eat less, move more. But lately, I've been in a funk and feeling like I just can't do it on my own. So I started thinking about surgery. I know I'd never do gastric bypass but the 'lesser evil,' Lap-Band surgery, I would consider.....have considered.....considering right now. One part of me is saying, 'NO, YOU CAN DO IT WITHOUT SURGERY!' while the other part is saying, 'OH YEAH??? WELL, WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE IT YET...HUH, HUH?
I've looked at the pros and cons and I'm not afraid of getting the surgery. I know what the possible & probable side effects are and they don't 'scare' me much. What has held me back from doing it is my own ego & pride. If I do it, then people will say/think I took the 'easy way out.' I know I shouldn't care about others' thoughts & opinions but the competitor in me wants the 'trophy' and recognition from doing it without surgery. I mean, lots of people have done it. There are many who can boast how they ate & exercised their way to a body that is 100, 200, 300, 400 lbs lighter, WITHOUT SURGERY.
I really wanna be one of those people and I know I can be. But what's the use of knowing but not doing.....knowing and not being? I've been in this fight for almost 20 years and over time, I've gotten farther and father away from my goal....from the win. Now, time is truly of the essence. The stakes are higher for me now that I am dealing with the early stages of diabetes. Yes, my weight has finally caught up with me in a way that I cannot avoid. I no longer have the 'luxury of time' being on my side. I must do something about my weight OR ELSE.
It makes me sad to admit that I haven't changed my habits much since my diagnosis. Which brings me to my current state of mind.....to be a surgery candidate or not to be. Deciding to have the surgery just might be more of a necessity than a personal choice....so I have to ask myself, what is more important.....my body/health or other people's opinions?
