BOOKS: How many of us have them.....and how many is too many?

As I prepare to check one more thing (relocation) off of my 40 in 40 List, I am faced with a dilemma - to bring or not to bring?


I've been wanting to move out-of-state for the past few years and have even set a few moving dates. But, it never seemed to be the 'right' time....until now. Baby girl has finally left the nest and Mom has moved in to care for Grandma so there is nothing to stop me from making moves. The last date I set was April 28th so I started packing my things in February. I think I did a pretty good job of weeding out the unnecessary and managed to box up everything, except for my clothing & personal use items and my books. Ahhhhhh, my book collection!

If you didn't know, I love Love LOVE to read....and I have many books and magazines to prove it. I have no idea just how many books I own (maybe I'll put 'count books' on my to-do list) but I own quite a few. I finally took them off of their shelves and put them into boxes last weekend. Then, I thought to myself, 'Do I really need to take all of these books with me?' I mean, I've read most of them; out of, say 150, I've read at least 140. Over the years, in response to various people remarking that I need to give my books away, I've said, 'I just might want to read them again.' Yet, I can't think of a time I've actually re-read any of my books. I liked the thought of having them there, though, just in case. Now, I'm rethinking that thought.

I have three boxes of heavy, already read (and truthfully, out of my head) books: small ones, large ones, thin ones, extra-thick ones, sad, happy, glad-to-be-nappy ones, paper back, hardcover and even audio-taped ones. How many of these books do I really need to keep? It's one thing to carry them, locally, from residence to residence but, do I love them that much to ship them across state lines??? I don't know about that. As much as I opposed them, when they first came out, feeling much like Amanda Talar (read her, she's awesome!), I've come to appreciate my Kindle. Not only do I love the convenience & lightness of it (just throw in purse & go), I've also come to like the feel of it in my hand....almost as much as I like the feel of an actual book. I have enough books in my Kindle 'unread' collection to keep me busy for the next month or two, so why can't I say 'bye-bye' to my hardcopies and move on with my e-copies?

I mean, as much as I'd like to believe I will, I probably won't ever go back and read any of the books I have sitting in boxes taking up space, waiting to be shipped to and stored in another state. The more I think about it, the more I think, 'Nahhhhhh....don't do it.' Not only will it save me a few dollars in shipping costs, but it will also save me time and energy that I will use to organize them in a new place. So, I think I will go through them, take out the few that I really love (my favorites, that I juuuuuuuust might peek at again...or give away) and the ones I haven't read yet and get rid of the rest. I would never just throw out a book, of course, but I will donate some and sell some at the garage sale I will be participating in, in the near future. I feel a sense of relief already, with that being said, so I can just imagaine how I'll feel when I actually do it. Yup, sounds like a plan!

See what writing down your thoughts and feelings can do for you?


P.S. Now my O Magazine collection? That's a whole 'nother story/post! ;-)

'40 in 40': BFly's 40th Birthday Bucket List

In forty weeks and six days, I will be celebrating my fortieth birthday. Me, 40 years old…..WOW. Unlike when I was facing the age of 30, I am not feeling sad about turning 40. I was almost always the eldest person in my close group of relatives & friends and I’ve never had a problem with that…..at any age. That might be because I’ve never looked my age so it always felt good to hear people say, ‘You’re (insert number) years old?! GTFOH!’ or could be because I’ve just never had a problem with my age.  It feels weird when I say it aloud but other than that, hey, it is what it is.  Anyway, in my 39 years and 86 days on earth, I’ve had all kinds of experiences, been many places and met hundreds (thousands?) of people. Most of these experiences, I have shared with my siblings, relatives or long-time close friends. But there are many more people I should meet & share life with and much more for me to see, do, experience and enjoy.  So, in what I call my ‘Second Act’ of life, I intend to broaden my horizons, step outside my same ole square box and stop spending so much time in my comfort zone.

To kick off my ‘second act,’ I have decided to have 40 new experiences (big or small) in the 40 weeks leading up to my 40^th birthday. Each week, beginning Thursday, March 1^st and ending Wednesday, December 5^th, I will do something new or different; every following Thursday, beginning March 8^th and ending on my birthday, December 6^th, I will post about the new experience I had the week before. So far, I have compiled a list of  <40 things I would like to do.  As time goes on, I’m sure I will be inspired to add more to the list. I am also open to suggestions.

BFly's 40^th Birthday Bucket List:

1. Go one full week (that’s 7 days or 148 hours) without any contact or communication with my sisters. (Please pray for me!)

2. Submit my writing to at least one major magazine.
October 2013

3. Lose, at least, 40 lbs.

4. Become a licensed bartender.

5. Relocate to Charlotte, NC.
August 2013

6. Take a weekend long trip with myself.

7. Ask a guy out on a date.

8. Pick up the tab on a date (not necessarily the date in #7).  I was asked out on a lunch date and my date was shocked out of his socks pleasantly surprised when I offered to pick up the check. 3/23/12

9. Fall in love….with someone worthy of my love.

10. Go one week without spending any $ on fast food/dining out.
October 2013

11. Make a sexy calendar 

12. Start a job doing something I love.

13. Take a dance class.

14. Get a(nother) tattoo

15. Treat myself to a spa day

16. Host at least one Charity Event

17. Break at least one of my bad habits (going to bed late, getting up late, eating out 90% of the time, procrastinating 90% of the time, not sticking to savings plan, overspending on gifts for others……just to name a few).

18. Have the awkward conversation that I’ve been avoiding; gotta say it and move on

19. Run for at least a half mile.

20. Eat something I’ve never eaten before at a restaurant I’ve never been to. (Any suggestions?)
21. Make peace with each of my siblings (oh, you thought we were 'perfect?'...NOT.....pray for me!)
Aug 2013
22. Purchase something outrageously expensive (nothing to make me homeless but something I'd otherwise say, "sheeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiittttt!" to)
23. Go Jet-Skiing
December 2012
24. Take a sabbatical of (at least) 30 days
February 2013 (LOA)
25. Revamp my wardrobe
26. Host a  5-course dinner party
27. Go to a live taping of a show
2013 Additions
28. Try online dating....and actually go out on a date with someone met on the site.

What are some things you think I should do before I turn 40? Hurry up and tell me, time is ticking!   

UPDATE 11/04/13: Up until today, my list only had 27 things on it and I didn't accomplish these goals before I turned 40. However, I will continue to pursue them and add more until I reach 40 things. Instead of '40 in 40' before I turn 40, they are on my list of '40 in 40' to accomplish during my (estimated 40 more years) Second Act of life...

Home......

I spent a few days in Charlotte, NC this past weekend and.....oh, what a feeling!  I went to visit my sister & her boyfriend and to see what the Queen City was all about. Along with escaping the daily stress of my life at home, I mostly wanted to get an idea of what life would be like, as the third  wheel roommate in my sister's house. Although I didn't get a tour of the city, I went along with my sister, as she ran errands. I realized almost everything is a drive away; there would be no such thing as running to the corner store real quick. I also met a few good people and saw some great (looking) neighborhoods. Nights were quiet and peaceful so I was able to get a good night's sleep.  What a difference a restful sleep makes!

As for extra-curricular activities, I didn't want to go to any clubs so partying was not in the plan.  We did go out for drinks on Saturday night, though. We stopped in at Wet Willie's and had one of their famous alcoholic daiquiris and some food.  Then, we went to a sports bar where a live band was playing. I loved the atmosphere of the place but the crowd was geared more towards my mother's age group. Nevertheless, I enjoyed myself. While I didn't experience the nightlife full-blast, I've done my research so I know Charlotte has a lot for me to discover and experience. I spent most of my vacation close to the (my sister's) house but, I must say, with its 'small town in a big city' appeal, Charlotte felt like....home.